3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I CAN MOONWALK!
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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