God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
