just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize