Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(760): View more from California

Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.

(912): View more from Georgia

What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?

(760): View more from California

I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.

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(904): View more from Florida

Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.

Fav 1 1025 1964
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(859): View more from Kentucky

Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.

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