should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
