is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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