im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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