Plan B is the new Plan A
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
