Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Small penises have feelings too.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
The power of my boobs compel you
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
