sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
