WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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