Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Randomize
