and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
The beer is more important than you right now.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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