i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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