apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
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