did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
