dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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