It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
