dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
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