when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You are the jesus of drinking
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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