I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
