Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
why is half of my head shaved?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
