$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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