when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize