hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
