Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize
