i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
