it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
