Your mouth is God's brothel.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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