jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Your penis caused this!
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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