she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
