Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
