Dual....:-)
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
