She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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