One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize