Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
My vagina is officially offended.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
