i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
