O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Rumble strips road head = magical
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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