we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
soo... how was my night?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
