i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
