So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
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