he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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