he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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