yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
