Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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