We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
