literally had 100 drinks last night.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
