Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
