Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
This girl is more easily done than said...
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
