But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
