Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
