she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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